AMERICAN CANYON, CALIF. — G. L. Mezzetta Inc. has recalled one lot of its 32-ounce Golden Greek Peperoncini, Medium Heat, due to the presence of a pest contaminant in the jar, and the nation has responded in the only sensible way: by opening every jar it owns and looking inside, which is a behavior that has never once been recommended by anyone and has now become the single most common activity in America.

The recall covers SKU 10106328, Lot 720106 — a number that has been memorized by an entire country, and memorized correctly, which is more than can be said for most phone numbers. The notice does not use the word mouse. The public uses the word mouse. The gap between those two positions is where the American people live.

A patron at a delicatessen in Cleveland, who had purchased four jars before the recall and four jars after it, said he now opens every jar at home over the sink, alone, at night, and that he has found nothing but peppers, and that he is not stopping. “I don’t trust the jar,” he said. “I trust me and the sink.” That is, frankly, the most honest food-safety policy any household has ever produced.

Mayor Debbie Kroll of a town in Ohio with 4,100 residents has asked residents to report their jars to the village office, not because the village can do anything about a jar, but because the village would like to know how many jars there are. As of Wednesday the count was 214, and the mayor described the number as “the most accurate thing we’ve ever had.”

A high school sophomore in Texas, who ate an entire jar of pepperoncini in eleven minutes on a dare in March and is now the subject of a recall he personally qualifies for, said the situation was “fine, honestly,” and that he had already looked inside his jar twice. He said the brine was the best part. He said the pepper was “just a pepper with a secret.”

"I've been eating pepperoncini for thirty years. I never looked. Now I look every time. I have not found a mouse, and I have found that I like looking. That's the real recall."

THE JAR, AT A GLANCE

  • The affected lot: One. Lot 720106, which the country can now recite.
  • The word the notice uses: “Pest contaminant.” The word the country uses: a shorter one.
  • The household protocol: Open, look, over the sink, at night, alone. No agency recommends this. Every household does it.
  • The brine: Still, by every account, excellent.

At press time, the deli counter in Cleveland had sold nine jars on Wednesday, and eight of them were opened in the store before customers left, by customers themselves, using their own spoons. At press time, the deli had stopped selling jars and started selling spoons.